The Federal Republic of Ophaesia is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by First Citizen Badass with an even hand, and notable for its multi-spousal wedding ceremonies, smutty television, and stringent health and safety legislation. The compassionate, democratic population of 13.6 billion Ophaesians enjoy extensive civil freedoms, particularly in social issues, while business tends to be more regulated.

The large, liberal government juggles the competing demands of Education, Healthcare, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Scranton. The average income tax rate is 95.7%.

The frighteningly efficient Ophaesian economy, worth a remarkable 2,196 trillion Dollars a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is quite specialized, is led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Book Publishing, and Arms Manufacturing. Average income is an impressive 161,471 Dollars, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The volume of paperwork used to complete a single environmental assessment defeats the purpose, the carbon footprint falls along with the human footprint during war, the contraband cigarette trade is lighting up across Ophaesia, and every school is receiving a brand new eraser. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Ophaesia's national animal is the Hawk, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Ophaesia is ranked 14,468^th in the world and 11^th in The Region That Has No Big Banks for Most Subsidized Industry, scoring 8,352.21 on the Gilded Widget Scale.