The Federal Empire of Pyleland is a massive, safe nation, ruled by Empress Pyle Taibénia with an iron fist, and notable for its public floggings, compulsory military service, and smutty television. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, devout population of 4.506 billion Pylish are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The large, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Education, Industry, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Tyral. The average income tax rate is 74.3%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Pylish economy, worth 601 trillion Pynes a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Tourism industry, with significant contributions from Book Publishing, Arms Manufacturing, and Basket Weaving. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an impressive 133,478 Pynes, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Skateparks can be found in every city, distant and obscure female relatives succeed to the Pylish throne, victims of crime are viewed as less trustworthy than politicians, and the official Pylish Phrase Book weighs as much as a small child. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Pyleland's national animal is the Phoenix, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is Velaism.

Pyleland is ranked 239,940^th in the world and 1,190^th in Europeia for Most Cheerful Citizens, with 47.09 Percentage Of Water Glasses Perceived Half-Full.