The Confederacy of Valdion is a colossal, safe nation, ruled by Lord General Draxnair Valun with an iron fist, and remarkable for its parental licensing program, pith helmet sales, and ubiquitous missile silos. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 6.501 billion Valdionians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The large, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Defense, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Baku. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 87.7%.

The frighteningly efficient Valdionian economy, worth a remarkable 1,072 trillion Pounds a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Tourism, and Book Publishing. Average income is an impressive 164,898 Pounds, with the richest citizens earning 6.7 times as much as the poorest.

Textbooks are exactly twice as heavy as they used to be, the year's most anticipated show is "Great Deals on Delicious Meals", government agents stalk the aisles of grocery stores for out-of-stock medications, and Big Agriculture has the government by the nuts. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Valdion's national animal is the Raven, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is Christianity.

Valdion is ranked 192,741^st in the world and 880^th in Europeia for Highest Foreign Aid Spending, scoring -3.16 on the Clooney Contribution Index.