The Ancient Nordic Lands of Alvalero is a gargantuan, safe nation, ruled by Zander with an even hand, and remarkable for its parental licensing program, strictly enforced bedtime, and frequent executions. The hard-nosed, devout population of 30.346 billion Alvalerans have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The government — a sprawling, bureaucracy-choked morass — juggles the competing demands of Healthcare, Education, and Defense. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Aarhus. The average income tax rate is 90.6%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Alvaleran economy, worth a remarkable 2,751 trillion Alvaleran Dollars a year, is highly specialized and led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing and Book Publishing. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is 90,667 Alvaleran Dollars, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.0 times as much as the poorest.

Artificial intelligence seeking exciting work are overcome with ennui, carrots are orange, apples are red and food waste is increasing, the newly revamped army is so eager for action that it has trouble keeping the peace, and Zander is plotting to coup the Pacific (Alvalero has found 3 easter eggs). Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Alvalero's national animal is the White Wolf, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Norse Mythology.

Alvalero is ranked 14,142^nd in the world and 744^th in Balder for Most Cheerful Citizens, with 53.84 Percentage Of Water Glasses Perceived Half-Full.