The Metallic Brotherhood of Tikariot is a titanic, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by The Grey Eminence with an even hand, and notable for its museums and concert halls, otherworldly petting zoo, and public floggings. The compassionate, cheerful population of 13.87 billion Tikariotians are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The enormous, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Education, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Port Rhovanyon. The average income tax rate is 92.3%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Tikariotian economy, worth a remarkable 1,855 trillion auranurs a year, is quite specialized and led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Book Publishing, Information Technology, and Cheese Exports. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 133,765 auranurs, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Trolls insist that strings of racial slurs mean "good morning" in obscure languages, prisoners enjoy gruel served by fellow sullen inmates wearing reindeer ears, at least 1% of the Ministry of Foreign Affairs budget goes to The Grey Eminence's wardrobe, and the words guilty and evidence have left the Tikariotian lexicon. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Tikariot's national animal is the snowy owl, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is Heavymetallism.

Tikariot is ranked 324,841^st in the world and 63^rd in Rushmore for Rudest Citizens, with 6.61 insults per minute.