The Kingdom of Calicov is a massive, safe nation, ruled by Jurich Von Licenstein IV with an even hand, and notable for its pith helmet sales, anti-smoking policies, and soft-spoken computers. The hard-nosed population of 1.431 billion Calicovians are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The large, socially-minded government prioritizes Defense, although Administration, Education, and Law & Order are also considered important, while International Aid isn't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Calconiea Prime. The average income tax rate is 75.6%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The all-consuming Calicovian economy, worth 177 trillion Calconiean Rupies a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector is led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Tourism, and Book Publishing. Average income is an impressive 124,301 Calconiean Rupies, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Vacationing Calicovians expect to be treated as royalty, court cases mostly involve lawyers shouting questions at witnesses giving silent shrugs, religious leaders order congregants to love any neighbour who is just like themselves, and heirs who take too long in the bathroom are declared missing and presumed dead. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Calicov's national animal is the Cat, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Neko.

Calicov is ranked 17,161^st in the world and 335^th in Europe for Most Beautiful Environments, with 1,133.46 pounds of wildlife per square mile.