The Republic of Loukonia is a massive, cultured nation, ruled by Toussaint Vasseur Sauvé de Corbenay with an iron fist, and renowned for its compulsory military service, frequent executions, and absence of drug laws. The hard-nosed, cynical, devout population of 1.333 billion Loukonians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The large, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Administration, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Lucerna. The average income tax rate is 78.1%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Loukonian economy, worth 172 trillion livres a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a large, well-organized, broadly diversified black market in Arms Manufacturing, Retail, Soda Sales, and Information Technology. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 129,654 livres, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Animal Liberationists are regularly arrested, government ministers claim to ride dragons to work, terrified tympanists are finding themselves on the front lines armed only with kettledrums, and the population's jaw muscles put sharks to shame. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Loukonia's national animal is the eagle, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to toxic air pollution, and its national religion is Catholic.

Loukonia is ranked 239,963^rd in the world and 65^th in Arctica for Highest Food Quality, scoring 8.43 on the Meeshlin-Starr Index.