The Nomadic Peoples of Cannitan is a massive, socially progressive nation, ruled by Sir Beans McCracken with an even hand, and renowned for its absence of drug laws, restrictive gun laws, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate population of 3.6 billion Cannitanians are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

It is difficult to tell where the omnipresent, socially-minded government stops and the rest of society begins, but it juggles the competing demands of Welfare, Environment, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of The Dolly Parton Dream-Village. The average income tax rate is 95.8%.

The strong Cannitanian economy, worth 281 trillion Fins a year, is driven almost entirely by government activity, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector is solely comprised of the Book Publishing industry. Average income is 78,325 Fins, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Citizens praise the weeds that overwhelm their narrow vegetable realm, national park visitors are reporting a rash of poison ivy sightings, the "Underwear of Women in Power" issue of The The Dolly Parton Dream-Village Times is sold out, and the government decides its policies by observing the flight of birds. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Cannitan's national animal is the Dolphin, which frolics freely in the nation's sparkling oceans, and its national religion is Giant Lasagna.

Cannitan is ranked 280,264^th in the world and 10,497^th in Osiris for Largest Cheese Export Sector, scoring -10.43 on the Mozzarella Productivity Index.