The Awkward Adages of Geektopia is a gargantuan, cultured nation, ruled by Nijchhōh I with an even hand, and renowned for its national health service, ritual sacrifices, and complete lack of prisons. The hard-nosed, hard-working, humorless, devout population of 11.701 billion Kwandoites are highly moralistic and fiercely conservative, in the sense that they tend to believe most things should be outlawed. People who have good jobs and work quietly at them are lauded; others are viewed with suspicion.

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic government juggles the competing demands of Industry, Administration, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Mordecai. The average income tax rate is 96.7%.

The frighteningly efficient Geektopian economy, worth a remarkable 4,392 trillion cryptos a year, is fairly diversified and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Information Technology, Retail, Woodchip Exports, and Book Publishing. Average income is an amazing 375,406 cryptos, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 4.0 times as much as the poorest.

The roar of the Niagara 3000 mega-loo can be heard several blocks away, bargain-hunting is considered unpatriotic, to 'cut off family ties' is no longer just a phrase, and private records are being put online with a convenient "download" button. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Geektopia's national animal is the ass, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Math.

Geektopia is ranked 35,398^th in the world and 124^th in Europeia for Largest Gambling Industry, scoring 5,745.47 on the Kelly Criterion Productivity Index.