The Totally Still an NPC of The Ostartic Federation is a colossal, socially progressive nation, ruled by Head Researcher Bryan Osley with an even hand, and renowned for its ban on automobiles, irreverence towards religion, and complete absence of social welfare. The hard-working, democratic population of 8.469 billion Ostarticans have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The minute government, or what there is of one, juggles the competing demands of Education, Healthcare, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Nosk's Landing. The average income tax rate is 5.1%.

The strong Ostartic Federationian economy, worth 609 trillion OSUS a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Beef-Based Agriculture industry, with major contributions from Gambling, Pizza Delivery, and Information Technology. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 72,002 OSUS, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.7 times as much as the poorest.

Lip-readers are often left perplexed by political rallies, the nation's arms dealers guarantee discretion and untraceable transactions, people reciting Shakespeare have become a common sight, and city budgets are spent entirely on supporting the town royalty. Crime is moderate, with the police force struggling against a lack of funding and a high mortality rate. The Ostartic Federation's national animal is the Emperor Penguin, which frolics freely in the nation's sparkling oceans, and its national religion is Börk Sect.

The Ostartic Federation is ranked 100,504^th in the world and 37^th in Saint Helene for Nicest Citizens, with 13.62 average smiles per day.