The Kingdom of Abetton is a colossal, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by King Latimer with an iron fist, and remarkable for its pith helmet sales, compulsory military service, and smutty television. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical population of 6.836 billion Abettonians are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The medium-sized, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Administration, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Sauville. The average income tax rate is 64.3%.

The frighteningly efficient Abettonian economy, worth 861 trillion Abetton florins a year, is led by the Beef-Based Agriculture industry, with significant contributions from Tourism, Arms Manufacturing, and Book Publishing. Black market activity is extensive. Average income is an impressive 125,993 Abetton florins, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 4.5 times as much as the poorest.

Colonial citizens are forced to sing the praise of the "Great Abettonian Liberator", the education system has gotten a recent boost in spending, Maxtopian tourists make expensive pilgrimages to Sauville to enjoy their national art, and virtually all of the country's economic activity takes place in Sauville. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Abetton's national animal is the Stallion, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Abetton Polytheism.

Abetton is ranked 176,921^st in the world and 57^th in Greater Dienstad for Highest Foreign Aid Spending, scoring zero on the Clooney Contribution Index.