Population | 16.696 billion |
Capital | Moscow |
Leader | Putin |
Faith | Hunting Capitalists |
Currency | dollar |
Animal | cow |
The United Socialist States of Colbala Con is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Putin with an iron fist, and notable for its compulsory vegetarianism, ritual sacrifices, and rampant corporate plagiarism. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 16.696 billion Colbala Conians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."
The large, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Law & Order, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Moscow. The average income tax rate is 74.9%, and even higher for the wealthy.
The frighteningly efficient Colbala Conian economy, worth a remarkable 3,079 trillion dollars a year, is mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Retail, Uranium Mining, Arms Manufacturing, and Furniture Restoration. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an impressive 184,465 dollars, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.5 times as much as the poorest.
No one believes anything until it has been strenuously tested and peer-reviewed, closed universities are currently being converted into McRonald's restaurants, prime commercial land is being swamped with archaeological teams, and Colbala Conian watches are often the only thing to survive a disaster intact. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Colbala Con's national animal is the cow, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Hunting Capitalists.
Colbala Con is ranked 12,178th in the world and 1st in Russia for Most Advanced Public Education, scoring 10,189.11 on the Edu-tellignce® Test Score.
National Happenings
Most Recent Government Activity:
- : Colbala Con was ranked in the Top 1% of the world for Largest Black Market, Most Avoided, and Most Primitive and the Top 5% for Highest Economic Output and Most Advanced Public Education.
- : Following new legislation in Colbala Con, Colbala Conian watches are often the only thing to survive a disaster intact.
- : Following new legislation in Colbala Con, prime commercial land is being swamped with archaeological teams.
- : Following new legislation in Colbala Con, closed universities are currently being converted into McRonald's restaurants.
- : Following new legislation in Colbala Con, no one believes anything until it has been strenuously tested and peer-reviewed.
- : Following new legislation in Colbala Con, the government is well known for declaring war on other countries for suspected slights.
- : Following new legislation in Colbala Con, teddy bear James Dean (aka "the Rebel Without the Claws") helps convince kids that candy cigarettes are cool.
- : Following new legislation in Colbala Con, work creation schemes keep the masses occupied with meaningless tasks.
- : Following new legislation in Colbala Con, only the rich can afford the latest medical innovations.
- : Following new legislation in Colbala Con, the overhead luggage compartment is often full.