The Sovereign Order of Everlasting Crusade is a gargantuan, orderly nation, ruled by Hochmeister General with an iron fist, and remarkable for its zero percent divorce rate, triple-decker prams, and ubiquitous missile silos. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 13.563 billion Crusaders are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

It is difficult to tell where the omnipresent, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government stops and the rest of society begins, but it prioritizes Spirituality, although Law & Order, Defense, and Environment are also considered important, while Social Policy and Welfare are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Antioch. The average income tax rate is 94.1%.

The frighteningly efficient Crusader economy, worth a remarkable 1,961 trillion Crosses a year, is driven almost entirely by government activity. The industrial sector is solely comprised of the Basket Weaving industry. Average income is an impressive 144,653 Crosses, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.0 times as much as the poorest.

Rebuilding efforts for a recently destroyed cathedral aren't expected to be completed for another century, claims adjusters are uselessly vague, a full moon at night lets economists sleep tight, and wood-framed catapults are ready to launch diseased corpses into besieged cities. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force. Everlasting Crusade's national animal is the Lamb, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Yes.

Everlasting Crusade is ranked 118^th in the world and 1^st in Force for Most Primitive, scoring 603.11 on the Scary Big Number Scale.