The Imperial State of Shnailand is a gargantuan, cultured nation, ruled by Great Leader with an iron fist, and notable for its multi-spousal wedding ceremonies, compulsory military service, and public floggings. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 18.456 billion Shnailandians are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.

The enormous, corrupt, socially-minded, well-organized government prioritizes Defense, with Education, Industry, and Healthcare also on the agenda. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Shnailand City. The income tax rate is 100%.

The frighteningly efficient Shnailandian economy, worth a remarkable 5,877 trillion Shnailandian Notes a year, is quite specialized and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Book Publishing, and Door-to-door Insurance Sales. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an amazing 318,434 Shnailandian Notes, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Loudmouthed journalists are given the chop, scientific journals publish third-graders' school essays, people stand their fridges back-to-front to benefit from the free heating, and mums always ask their three-year-olds for permission before hugging them. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Shnailand's national animal is the Shnail, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Christianity.

Shnailand is ranked 292,141^st in the world and 4,170^th in the Pacific for Most Primitive, scoring -888.18 on the Scary Big Number Scale.