The Kingdom of Tramolvalnia is a massive, socially progressive nation, ruled by King Heron with an even hand, and remarkable for its ban on automobiles, punitive income tax rates, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate, cheerful population of 3.736 billion Tramolvalnians are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The enormous, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Education, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Cornelești. The average income tax rate is 94.1%.

The frighteningly efficient Tramolvalnian economy, worth 456 trillion Cookies a year, is highly specialized and led by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Book Publishing, Tourism, and Basket Weaving. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 122,323 Cookies, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The richest individuals apparently buy nothing but noodles and toilet paper, public footpaths are being slowly eroded by the burgeoning number of ramblers, the lactose-intolerant are force-fed cheese products with predictably gassy results, and every diamond ring sold is accompanied by a twenty-five page analysis and a waiver. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Tramolvalnia's national animal is the wolf, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Tramolvalnia is ranked 276,462^nd in the world and 582^nd in A Taco Paradise for Most Primitive, scoring -297.81 on the Scary Big Number Scale.