The Free Land of Kalaratri is a gargantuan, cultured nation, ruled by Stjepan Filipović with an even hand, and renowned for its rum-swilling pirates, pith helmet sales, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate, cheerful population of 11.392 billion Kalaratrianis enjoy extensive civil rights and enjoy a level of social equality free from the usual accompanying government corruption.

The large, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Užupis. The average income tax rate is 98.0%.

The frighteningly efficient Kalaratrianian economy, worth a remarkable 2,680 trillion Kelantanese dinars a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is quite specialized, is led by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Book Publishing and Tourism. Average income is an amazing 235,318 Kelantanese dinars, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

School lockers are filled with fancy underwear, the KBI Channel Tunnel project is plagued by delays, dynamite sales and concert audiences are booming, and populations of two-headed Rattenkönigs have been found around recently-uncovered archaeological sites. Crime is totally unknown. Kalaratri's national animal is the Rattenkönig, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Eternalux.

Kalaratri is ranked 9,084^th in the world and 255^th in The East Pacific for Safest, scoring 122.57 on the Bubble-Rapp Safety Rating.