The Empire of Cassinea is a massive, orderly nation, ruled by Johnny Bingus with an iron fist, and renowned for its compulsory military service, irreverence towards religion, and punitive income tax rates. The hard-nosed, cynical population of 3.398 billion Cassineans are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.

The enormous, corrupt, socially-minded, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Education, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Anvil. The average income tax rate is 80.5%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The powerhouse Cassinean economy, worth 391 trillion Crowns a year, is quite specialized and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Uranium Mining, and Cheese Exports. Black market activity is rampant. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 115,219 Crowns, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The dessert 'Death by Chocolate' isn't the most lethal dish on the menu, the alarmingly racist TV show 'Bigtopians Say the Darndest Things' is a hit, the news is showing footage of Johnny Bingus bullying an old man to the point of tears, and citizens are regularly arrested in queues for 'loitering'. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Cassinea's national animal is the Crow, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is Bingustry.

Cassinea is ranked 26,589^th in the world and 54^th in Conch Kingdom for Most Patriotic, with 41.08 flags saluted per person per day.