The Kingdom of Belgophia is a massive, efficient nation, ruled by King owen the beast with an even hand, and remarkable for its complete lack of prisons, ritual sacrifices, and fear of technology. The hard-nosed, hard-working, humorless, devout population of 1.727 billion Belgophians are highly moralistic and fiercely conservative, in the sense that they tend to believe most things should be outlawed. People who have good jobs and work quietly at them are lauded; others are viewed with suspicion.

The large, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Malyrov. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 69.5%.

The frighteningly efficient Belgophian economy, worth 167 trillion zepines a year, is quite specialized and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Uranium Mining, Information Technology, and Cheese Exports. Black market activity is frequent. Average income is 97,150 zepines, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 293,644 per year while the poor average 25,025, a ratio of 11.7 to 1.

For some reason the census focuses on daily banana ingestion and hourly quip rate, students do more community service than homework, it is still not known if the commander in chief outranks the supreme commander, and garden stores are not allowed to sell water butts. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Belgophia's national animal is the Garuda, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Belgophia is ranked 16,411^th in the world and 1,044^th in Lazarus for Most Advanced Public Education, scoring 8,858.31 on the Edu-tellignce® Test Score.