The Paradise of Lansaka is a colossal, safe nation, ruled by President Dianne Dawson with an even hand, and notable for its museums and concert halls, keen interest in outer space, and compulsory military service. The hard-nosed population of 8.764 billion Lansakans enjoy extensive civil rights and enjoy a level of social equality free from the usual accompanying government corruption.

The enormous, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Defense, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Port King. The average income tax rate is 84.1%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Lansakan economy, worth 977 trillion Lafas a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is quite specialized, is led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Tourism, and Retail. Average income is an impressive 111,540 Lafas, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

People stand their fridges back-to-front to benefit from the free heating, standing on a chair to reach a top shelf is seen as evidence of narcissistic personality disorder, the government has cut taxes in the face of widespread tax evasion, and parking lots are littered with coffee cups and doughnut crumbs. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Lansaka's national animal is the Cottonmouth Coral Copperhead Rattlesnake, which frolics freely in the nation's sparkling oceans, and its national religion is Religionism.

Lansaka is ranked 271,973^rd in the world and 6,631^st in the Rejected Realms for Most Primitive, scoring -252.37 on the Scary Big Number Scale.