The Empire of The Germanic States of Europe is a massive, cultured nation, ruled by Kaiser August with an even hand, and renowned for its compulsory military service, otherworldly petting zoo, and anti-smoking policies. The hard-nosed, devout population of 2.475 billion Germans are prohibited from doing almost everything except voting, which they do timidly and conservatively.

The large, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Defense, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Vienna. The average income tax rate is 72.4%.

The frighteningly efficient German economy, worth 303 trillion Kaiserliche Marks a year, is led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Tourism, and Book Publishing. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 122,797 Kaiserliche Marks, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.9 times as much as the poorest.

A few people seem to spend their whole time complaining, older ladies are inundated with offers to help them cross the road, German husbands are dead good at fathering kids, and citizens are permitted to carry concealed handguns. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. The Germanic States of Europe's national animal is the Eagle and its national religion is Catholicism.

The Germanic States of Europe is ranked 279,004^th in the world and 279^th in The Land of Kings and Emperors for Most Primitive, scoring -323.58 on the Scary Big Number Scale.