The Constitutional Kingdom of Dlakisland is a colossal, safe nation, ruled by Kinig Duest I with an iron fist, and renowned for its smutty television, irreverence towards religion, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate, cynical population of 5.627 billion Dlaks are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.

The enormous government juggles the competing demands of Healthcare, Administration, and Defense. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Dralok Palace. The average income tax rate is 75.2%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The powerhouse Dlak economy, worth 482 trillion Dlakis Kronor a year, is quite specialized and led by the Trout Farming industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Arms Manufacturing, and Information Technology. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 85,743 Dlakis Kronor, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The government regularly publishes lengthy reports on its own excessive recordkeeping, orphanages are closing their doors as the government forces parents to actually raise their children, Pinkerton agents are called in to forcibly break up white collar strikes, and relations with Dàguó have warmed from frosty to chilly. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Dlakisland's national animal is the Royal Wolf, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is No Official Religion.

Dlakisland is ranked 16,195^th in the world and 41^st in The League for Highest Foreign Aid Spending, scoring 1,346.53 on the Clooney Contribution Index.