The Romanyan Principality of Montcrabe is a massive, efficient nation, ruled by Zinedine Monscrabel with an iron fist, and remarkable for its otherworldly petting zoo, ubiquitous missile silos, and frequent executions. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 3.219 billion Montcrabins are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government prioritizes Defense, with Law & Order, Industry, and Administration also on the agenda, while Welfare and Social Policy receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Montcrabe City. The average income tax rate is 48.3%.

The frighteningly efficient Montcrabean economy, worth 627 trillion crabinars a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Retail, Information Technology, and Uranium Mining. Black market activity is rampant. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an impressive 194,952 crabinars, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 4.6 times as much as the poorest.

'Mountain Doobie' is widely regarded as the nation's favourite drink, whenever pilots have to bail out the government bails out their company, a driving license is obtained not by passing a test but by passing a brown envelope, and creating cardboard imitations of missiles is a new top-secret military project. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Montcrabe's national animal is the crab, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Montcrabin Catholicism.

Montcrabe is ranked 212,381^st in the world and 303^rd in The League for Highest Foreign Aid Spending, scoring -4.47 on the Clooney Contribution Index.