The Empire of Great Bartholomew is a massive, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Emperor Jack I with an even hand, and notable for its pith helmet sales, irreverence towards religion, and absence of drug laws. The compassionate, hard-working population of 2.108 billion Bartholomewians have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The large government prioritizes Education, with Welfare, Healthcare, and Administration also on the agenda, while Spirituality is ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Floricia. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 65.9%.

The all-consuming Great Bartholomewian economy, worth 202 trillion Golden Lire a year, is fairly diversified and dominated by the Tourism industry, with significant contributions from Cheese Exports, Information Technology, and Beef-Based Agriculture. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 96,247 Golden Lire, with the richest citizens earning 6.2 times as much as the poorest.

Arbitration is mightier than the sword, scientists recently cloned the long-extinct feather-bellied Bartholomew Golden Lion, people believe that if you teach a man to fish he won't buy fish from you any more, and directors of low-budget sci-fi films are flocking to use Floricia as a backdrop. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Great Bartholomew's national animal is the Bartholomew Golden Lion, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Christian.

Great Bartholomew is ranked 56,275^th in the world and 1,116^th in The East Pacific for Highest Foreign Aid Spending, scoring 553.42 on the Clooney Contribution Index.