The Warmongering Scaredy Cats of Pacifist Cowards is a gargantuan, socially progressive nation, ruled by a drunk northerner with a fair hand, and notable for its pith helmet sales, sprawling nuclear power plants, and absence of drug laws. The compassionate, democratic, cheerful population of 19.006 billion Cowards hold their civil and political rights very dear, although the wealthy and those in business tend to be viewed with suspicion.

The enormous, liberal, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Peaceful Glade. The income tax rate is 100%.

The frighteningly efficient Cowardly economy, worth a remarkable 5,134 trillion shiny things a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is highly specialized, is led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Book Publishing, and Arms Manufacturing. Average income is an amazing 270,164 shiny things, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The nation was recently voted "most likely to betray its allies", the government has been criticized for giving away Pacifist Cowards's territory to anyone who claims it, politicians are often found scavenging bins at night to supplement their income, and putting houses on stilts is elevating house porches and prices alike. Crime is totally unknown. Pacifist Cowards's national animal is the peaceful herbivore, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Opiates.

Pacifist Cowards is ranked 1,401^st in the world and 32^nd in The East Pacific for Most Beautiful Environments, with 4,368.25 pounds of wildlife per square mile.