The Empire of Kixke is a massive, socially progressive nation, ruled by Emperor Jimy Ya acov and King David with an even hand, and remarkable for its avant-garde cinema, public floggings, and soft-spoken computers. The compassionate population of 2.592 billion Kixkelins are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The enormous, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Pinhas. The average income tax rate is 76.5%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The powerhouse Kixkean economy, worth 235 trillion Raials a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is quite specialized, is mostly made up of the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Basket Weaving, Furniture Restoration, and Retail. Average income is 91,006 Raials, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

'Totally Not Partisan News' is a line item on the government budget, producers insist that movie stars wear crash helmets in every scene, digital novelty coins make for surprising vanguards of the revolution, and jails have become colloquially known as 'vampire houses'. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Kixke's national animal is the owl, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is Kixkelin Orthodox Judaism.

Kixke is ranked 272,170^th in the world and 171^st in Democratic Socialist Assembly for Most Primitive, scoring -255.57 on the Scary Big Number Scale.