The Cornfields of Nazvanda is a massive, efficient nation, ruled by That one pig with an iron fist, and renowned for its smutty television, national health service, and compulsory vegetarianism. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 2.533 billion Nazvandians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The enormous, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government prioritizes Defense, with Industry, Healthcare, and Administration also on the agenda, while Welfare and Spirituality receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Deessburg. The average income tax rate is 78.1%.

The frighteningly efficient Nazvandian economy, worth 358 trillion Nazvandian Bitcoins a year, is highly specialized and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Arms Manufacturing, Basket Weaving, and Uranium Mining. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an impressive 141,603 Nazvandian Bitcoins, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.2 times as much as the poorest.

Doctors accused of having no heart reply that cardiology isn't their speciality, female brains are believed to heat up dangerously when 'overclocked', slavers view "what did your last slave die of" as a request for a demonstration, and card collectors duel to the death. Crime is pervasive, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Nazvanda's national animal is the Pig, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Lechonkism.

Nazvanda is ranked 275,652^nd in the world and 3,599^th in the West Pacific for Most Beautiful Environments, with 7.66 pounds of wildlife per square mile.