The Holy Empire of Dasteffy Schonionnat the randomL is a huge, socially progressive nation, remarkable for its state-planned economy, absence of drug laws, and stringent health and safety legislation. The democratic, devout population of 502 million of Those Touched by His Noodly Appendages love a good election, and the government gives them plenty of them. Universities tend to be full of students debating the merits of various civil and political rights, while businesses are tightly regulated and the wealthy viewed with suspicion.

The large, socially-minded, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Education, Spirituality, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Citadel of the Noodley One. The average income tax rate is 54.8%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The Dasteffy Schonionnat the randomLian economy, worth 28.4 trillion Black Lotuses a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a slick, highly efficient, broadly diversified black market in Uranium Mining, Basket Weaving, Arms Manufacturing, and Tourism. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is 56,608 Black Lotuses, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Daring to agree with another politician is grounds for instant dismissal, it's surprisingly hard to find pictures of the bad haircuts from Leader's childhood, the hardest thing for a mining operation to dig through is government red tape, and incarcerated crime lords manage their empires from massage tables. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Dasteffy Schonionnat the randomL's national animal is the Ferret.

Dasteffy Schonionnat the randomL is ranked 82,557^th in the world and 138^th in 10000 Islands for Most Primitive, scoring 25 on the Scary Big Number Scale.