The United Socialist States of Middle Green Irthistan is a massive, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Lieutenant Colonel Tord ändert with an iron fist, and remarkable for its frequent executions, fear of technology, and parental licensing program. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 4.29 billion Middle Green Irthistanians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The large, corrupt, moralistic, socially-minded government is primarily concerned with Defense, with Law & Order and Education also on the agenda. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Kaltensondheim. The average income tax rate is 86.8%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Middle Green Irthistanian economy, worth 691 trillion Opelalns a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a large, well-organized black market in Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, and Book Publishing. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 161,117 Opelalns, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Escaped birthday balloons are torpedoed out of the sky, the government has pinkie-promised never to use its veto power except in an emergency, a massive campaign is underway to ensure the race of Middle Green Irthistan remains pure, and evenings at university debating societies often end with everyone acknowledging both sides may well be right. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Middle Green Irthistan's national animal is the Wunderphus, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Hwuman sacrificeignism.

Middle Green Irthistan is ranked 256,155^th in the world and 779^th in The Communist Bloc for Largest Gambling Industry, scoring -7.3 on the Kelly Criterion Productivity Index.