The Democratic State of Pontion is a massive, safe nation, ruled by Ioannis with an even hand, and renowned for its pith helmet sales, prohibition of alcohol, and irreverence towards religion. The quiet, industrious population of 1.934 billion Pontiens have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The large government prioritizes Defense, with Education, Industry, and Administration also on the agenda, while Spirituality receives no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Pontezounta. The average income tax rate is 78.7%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Pontien economy, worth 252 trillion Pecounicas a year, is led by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Woodchip Exports, and Basket Weaving. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an impressive 130,785 Pecounicas, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Customer satisfaction with online delivery services is at an all time high, ships are encouraged to deliberately run aground onto Pontien beaches, people often feel unbalanced by their daily commute, and being able to unblock a u-bend pipe is considered a universally essential skill. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Pontion's national animal is the Peregrine falcon, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to toxic air pollution.

Pontion is ranked 21,560^th in the world and 467^th in the South Pacific for Lowest Crime Rates, with 88.58 law-abiding acts per hour.