The Empire of Ever Testing is a colossal, efficient nation, ruled by Smog Wawelski with an iron fist, and renowned for its museums and concert halls, anti-smoking policies, and stringent health and safety legislation. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical population of 5.209 billion Ever Testians are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The medium-sized, corrupt, well-organized government is dominated by the Department of Industry, with Education, Environment, and Healthcare also on the agenda, while International Aid and Welfare receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Wawel. The average income tax rate is 68.2%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Ever Testingian economy, worth a remarkable 1,334 trillion obwarzaneks a year, is broadly diversified and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Information Technology, Trout Farming, Tourism, and Beef-Based Agriculture. Average income is an amazing 256,242 obwarzaneks, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.3 times as much as the poorest.

Glittering new sports stadiums adorn every city and town, citizens seem fixated on 105m x 45m rectangles, coffee-addicted citizens look forward to baristas getting their name wrong at local coffee shops, and Ever Testians believe manners maketh the leader. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. Ever Testing's national animal is the lagun, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Church of Mighty Yeast.

Ever Testing is ranked 27,740^th in the world and 635^th in the South Pacific for Lowest Crime Rates, with 84.25 law-abiding acts per hour.