The Ceaseless Clusterfrick of Giratyphon is a colossal, orderly nation, ruled by Barry-chan with an iron fist, and notable for its closed borders, zero percent divorce rate, and restrictive gun laws. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 5.266 billion Giratyphons are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.

The enormous, corrupt, socially-minded, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Education, Defense, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Marah. The average income tax rate is 92.2%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The powerhouse Giratyphon economy, worth 715 trillion Jüns a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a large, well-organized, quite specialized black market in Information Technology, Arms Manufacturing, and Trout Farming. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 135,795 Jüns, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Foreign nations often blame poverty and terrorism on Giratyphon selfishness, doctors prescribe medicines but they rarely dispense hope or compassion, mums always ask their three-year-olds for permission before hugging them, and workers of "fairweather faith" claim six months of paid leave for holy days per year. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Giratyphon's national animal is the Fe, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Giratyphonia.

Giratyphon is ranked 283,406^th in the world and 385^th in The Leftist Assembly for Nicest Citizens, with 0.32 average smiles per day.