The United Socialist States of Martilliopen is a colossal, socially progressive nation, ruled by the General Confederation of Labour with a fair hand, and notable for its state-planned economy, otherworldly petting zoo, and stringent health and safety legislation. The compassionate, democratic, cheerful population of 8.535 billion Martilliopenians are free to do what they want with their own bodies, and vote for whomever they like in elections; if they go into business, however, they are regulated to within an inch of their lives.

The enormous, liberal, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Education, and Healthcare. The average income tax rate is 99.1%.

The frighteningly efficient Martilliopenian economy, worth a remarkable 1,763 trillion guilders a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is highly specialized, is mostly made up of the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Tourism and Book Publishing. Average income is an amazing 206,647 guilders, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Crime is on the rise as DNA sampling has been all but outlawed, government bureaucrats devote many man-hours to trying to measure unquantifiables, the Treasury has been accused of flushing money down the toilet, and the new iVote app allows representatives to vote on legislation by launching ill-tempered birds and matching candies. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Martilliopen's national animal is the wolf, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Martilliopen is ranked 865^th in the world and 7^th in The Leftist Assembly for Nicest Citizens, with 103.21 average smiles per day.