The Federal Republic of Slonful is a gargantuan, safe nation, renowned for its multi-spousal wedding ceremonies, otherworldly petting zoo, and devotion to social welfare. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical population of 13.479 billion Slonfulians have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The large, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Healthcare, Education, and Law & Order. The average income tax rate is 71.7%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Slonfulian economy, worth a remarkable 1,303 trillion dollars a year, is quite specialized and dominated by the Book Publishing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Tourism, and Automobile Manufacturing. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 96,682 dollars, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.4 times as much as the poorest.

People typically base their votes on which party has the cutest logo, gay men commonly complain about their time of the month, a flying elephant and Leader share the same nickname, and most households' childcare costs are higher than their mortgage payments. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Slonful's national animal is the penguin, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Slonful is ranked 24,557^th in the world and 544^th in The East Pacific for Lowest Crime Rates, with 86.4 law-abiding acts per hour.