The Kingdom of Albyion Kingdom is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Don Fluffles with an iron fist, and renowned for its national health service, pith helmet sales, and stringent health and safety legislation. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical population of 11.046 billion Albyion Kingdomians are proud of their wide-ranging civil freedoms, and those who aren't tend to be dragged off the streets by men in dark suits and hustled into cars with tinted windows.

The relatively small, corrupt, liberal government prioritizes Education, although Administration, Industry, and Healthcare are also considered important, while Spirituality and International Aid receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of London. The average income tax rate is 59.0%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Albyion Kingdomian economy, worth a remarkable 2,973 trillion Pounds a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Retail, Book Publishing, and Arms Manufacturing. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an amazing 269,177 Pounds, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Murder rates are on the rise as the popularity of soylent products grows, mathematicians are gathering an infinite number of Lions and typewriters to see if they can recreate the works of Max Barry, there's never enough space in space, and Saturday morning cartoons feature full frontal nudity. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. Albyion Kingdom's national animal is the Lion, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Secularism.

Albyion Kingdom is ranked 5,690^th in the world and 88^th in the West Pacific for Lowest Crime Rates, with 113.58 law-abiding acts per hour.