The Imperial City and Hinterland of Perchan is a gargantuan, genial nation, ruled by Kaiser-Meister Grimald von Barschan with an iron fist, and notable for its sprawling nuclear power plants, compulsory military service, and anti-smoking policies. The compassionate, cynical population of 17.142 billion Perchanians are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The enormous, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Education, Healthcare, and Defense. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Imperial City of Perchan. The average income tax rate is 96.5%.

The frighteningly efficient Perchanian economy, worth a remarkable 2,935 trillion Imperial Perchmarks a year, is quite specialized and led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Information Technology and Arms Manufacturing. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 171,256 Imperial Perchmarks, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Feeling like a winner comes at a price, loudmouthed journalists are given the chop, a favorite "life hack" for gap year backpackers is to pretend to be homeless for government handouts, and surgical tape has taken on a distinctly red color. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Perchan's national animal is the Perchanian Bear, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Perchanian Reformation Church.

Perchan is ranked 286,408^th in the world and 11,070^th in Lazarus for Most Primitive, scoring -475.93 on the Scary Big Number Scale.