The United States of Aarde is a huge, environmentally stunning nation, remarkable for its pith helmet sales, frequent executions, and ubiquitous missile silos. The hard-nosed, devout population of 214 million Aardens are prohibited from doing almost everything except voting, which they do timidly and conservatively.

The large, moralistic, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Education, Law & Order, and Defense. The average income tax rate is 61.8%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The sizeable but underdeveloped Aarden economy, worth 7.23 trillion Dollars a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Door-to-door Insurance Sales, and Automobile Manufacturing. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 33,777 Dollars, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The justice of Aarde is considered superior to that of other nations, immigrant herding has become a national pastime, Leader can cry on demand, and Aardens incessantly needle their doctors for relief. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Aarde's national animal is the Bald Eagle, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies.

Aarde is ranked 55,110^th in the world and 1,681^st in The North Pacific for Most Cultured, scoring 71 on the Snufflebottom-Wiggendum Pentatonic Scale.