The Chaotic Nightmare Nation of Zandos is a huge, efficient nation, ruled by Eggward The Third with a fair hand, and renowned for its national health service, complete lack of prisons, and ubiquitous missile silos. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic population of 773 million Zandosians live in a state of perpetual fear, as a complete breakdown of social order has led to the rise of order through biker gangs.

The relatively small, corrupt, liberal, outspoken government prioritizes Industry, with Defense, Healthcare, and Education also on the agenda, while Spirituality and International Aid are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Zandian. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 8.6%.

The frighteningly efficient Zandosi economy, worth 97.8 trillion Zandollas a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a slick, highly efficient, broadly diversified black market in Information Technology, Retail, Soda Sales, and Arms Manufacturing. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 126,517 Zandollas, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 466,764 per year while the poor average 24,198, a ratio of 19.3 to 1.

Voting for pro-Bigtopian candidates is voluntary, trespassers entering Eggward The Third's office are immediately vaporized, octogenarian swimsuit models insist that they've still got it, and the nation is known abroad mostly for its Parliamentary antics. Crime, especially youth-related, is pervasive, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Zandos's national animal is the D U C C, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Zandos is ranked 294,716^th in the world and 6,540^th in The North Pacific for Lowest Crime Rates, with 9.01 law-abiding acts per hour.