The United States of New Paphlagonia is a very large, safe nation, remarkable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, frequent executions, and irreverence towards religion. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic population of 135 million New Paphlagonians enjoy a sensible mix of personal and economic freedoms, while the political process is open and the people's right to vote held sacrosanct.

The relatively small government juggles the competing demands of Healthcare, Law & Order, and Defense. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 8.9%.

The strong New Paphlagonian economy, worth 7.39 trillion dollars a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Door-to-door Insurance Sales industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Gambling, and Book Publishing. Average income is 54,716 dollars, with the richest citizens earning 5.8 times as much as the poorest.

Just as students finish their homework it's time for school, citizens are less concerned with policy and more concerned with whether politicians "call 'em like they see 'em", airport users are more worried about radiation than terrorism, and government popup ads are springing up like weeds. Crime, especially youth-related, is relatively low, thanks to a capable police force. New Paphlagonia's national animal is the Pacific Golden-Plover, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

New Paphlagonia is ranked 207,652^nd in the world and 3,921^st in the South Pacific for Nicest Citizens, with 9.76 average smiles per day.