The Empire of Quioni is a huge, efficient nation, remarkable for its smutty television, multi-spousal wedding ceremonies, and anti-smoking policies. The compassionate, hard-working population of 753 million Quionians have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The large government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Healthcare, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Armadale. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 63.3%.

The frighteningly efficient Quionian economy, worth 70.6 trillion Dollarias a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Basket Weaving, and Beef-Based Agriculture. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 93,748 Dollarias, with the richest citizens earning 6.0 times as much as the poorest.

Drug distribution is tightly controlled by the government, one tree's worth of paperwork accompanies each imported log of timber, all the playground's a stage for Quionian schoolchildren, and this year's hottest fashion trend is the Lese Majeste collection. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Quioni's national animal is the Knightus, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Quioni is ranked 14,682^nd in the world and 688^th in The North Pacific for Nicest Citizens, with 26.81 average smiles per day.