The Third Empire of The New Dacians is a gargantuan, safe nation, ruled by Marius Matei with an even hand, and renowned for its museums and concert halls, free-roaming dinosaurs, and pith helmet sales. The compassionate, devout population of 10.272 billion Dacians are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The medium-sized, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Education, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Pătrașcugrad. The average income tax rate is 88.5%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Dacian economy, worth a remarkable 1,857 trillion Râs a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Book Publishing, and Beef-Based Agriculture. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 180,795 Râs, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Streakers swamp all public events in order to bare it all, officer recruitment and police brutality have reached an all-time high, group hugs break out during floor votes, and more citizens have access to Maxtopian Grass than clean drinking water. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. The New Dacians's national animal is the Lynx, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Soterician Malchiahism.

The New Dacians is ranked 3,790^th in the world and 111^th in the South Pacific for Nicest Citizens, with 54.5 average smiles per day.