The Holy Cheesedom of Swiss Cheese Wheel is a huge, orderly nation, ruled by Monocle Man with an iron fist, and notable for its public floggings, ubiquitous missile silos, and frequent executions. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 958 million tricycles are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The relatively small, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government is primarily concerned with Defense, with Industry, Administration, and Environment also on the agenda, while Welfare and International Aid aren't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of The Zoo's Monkey Exhibit. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 18.4%.

The powerhouse tricycleian economy, worth 116 trillion cheeses a year, is led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Trout Farming, Gambling, and Beef-Based Agriculture. Black market activity is rampant. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 121,583 cheeses, but there is a large disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 463,911 per year while the poor average 22,044, a ratio of 21.0 to 1.

Homosexuality is a crime punishable by death, the nation's train stations are widely considered to be the ugliest in the South Pacific, citizens try to ignore gruesome pictures of decaying teeth printed on their soda cans, and weapons produced by newly nationalized armaments factories have been found to contain sawdust instead of gunpowder. Crime, especially youth-related, is pervasive, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Swiss Cheese Wheel's national animal is the exotic cheese toucan, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Swiss Cheese Wheel is ranked 295,155^th in the world and 5,704^th in the South Pacific for Lowest Crime Rates, with 14.56 law-abiding acts per hour.