The Holy Empire of Paladani is a massive, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Supreme Bishop with an even hand, and notable for its avowedly heterosexual populace, compulsory gun ownership, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate, devout population of 2.854 billion Paladanians are prohibited from doing almost everything except voting, which they do timidly and conservatively.

The enormous, moralistic, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Education, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Holyland. The average income tax rate is 97.8%.

The frighteningly efficient Paladanian economy, worth 430 trillion Paladanian Prayers a year, is highly specialized and led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Book Publishing, Information Technology, and Arms Manufacturing. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 150,899 Paladanian Prayers, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Jennifer Government is a bestseller, the tax agency is feared more than serial killers and terrorists, academics have a bone to pick with free market entrepreneurs, and gift baskets often contain working nukes. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Paladani's national animal is the Trinity Lamb, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Christianity.

Paladani is ranked 4,852^nd in the world and 210^th in The North Pacific for Most Cultured, scoring 172 on the Snufflebottom-Wiggendum Pentatonic Scale.