The Federal Republic of Feelixburg is a colossal, cultured nation, ruled by Felix Aterni with an iron fist, and notable for its complete lack of prisons, ritual sacrifices, and compulsory gun ownership. The hard-nosed, cynical, devout population of 5.109 billion Feelixburgers are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.

The large, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Healthcare, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Aetalhafen. The average income tax rate is 66.5%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The Feelixburgian economy, worth 338 trillion Felkors a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a large, well-organized black market in Tourism, Arms Manufacturing, Book Publishing, and Uranium Mining. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is 66,177 Felkors, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Thieves find battery shops juicier targets than banks, the government only announces the deaths of its members when it's convenient, all new "spies" are fifteen-year-old acne-ridden kids on computers, and it is said that a Feelixburgian woman's work is never done. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Feelixburg's national animal is the Harbor Seal, which frolics freely in the nation's sparkling oceans, and its national religion is Dogelore.

Feelixburg is ranked 230,253^rd in the world and 4,632^nd in The North Pacific for Most Primitive, scoring -107.85 on the Scary Big Number Scale.