The Socialist Meritocracy of Balcem is a massive, genial nation, ruled by Evenlyn Raleigh with a fair hand, and remarkable for its state-planned economy, free-roaming dinosaurs, and absence of drug laws. The compassionate, democratic population of 4.658 billion Balcemians hold their civil and political rights very dear, although the wealthy and those in business tend to be viewed with suspicion.

The large, liberal government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Pradia. The average income tax rate is 96.1%.

The frighteningly efficient Balcemian economy, worth 920 trillion Euros a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is fairly diversified, is led by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Tourism, Retail, and Book Publishing. Average income is an impressive 197,564 Euros, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

No one believes anything until it has been strenuously tested and peer-reviewed, anything is permissible when wearing latex gloves, every school is receiving a brand new eraser, and the sound of office water cooler chatter has been replaced by the whirring of computer cooling fans. Crime is totally unknown. Balcem's national animal is the Leafcutter Ant, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is None.

Balcem is ranked 289,643^rd in the world and 1,419^th in Europe for Most Primitive, scoring -632.3 on the Scary Big Number Scale.