The Prosperous Slavic Empire of Siromiana is a massive, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Jozef Pilduski with an even hand, and renowned for its pith helmet sales, national health service, and zero percent divorce rate. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, devout population of 3.77 billion Siromians have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The medium-sized, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Industry, Defense, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Warsaw. The average income tax rate is 47.2%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Siromianan economy, worth 396 trillion Sires a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Trout Farming industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Tourism, and Uranium Mining. Black market activity is frequent. Average income is an impressive 105,286 Sires, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.3 times as much as the poorest.

Not even good behaviour will get transgender inmates any special perks, the military recognizes no difference between male and female soldiers, leather-clad individuals can be seen walking their slaves in public parks, and Christianity has been named as Siromiana's national religion. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. Siromiana's national animal is the White Eagle, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Christianity.

Siromiana is ranked 198,207^th in the world and 3,684^th in the South Pacific for Nicest Citizens, with 10.55 average smiles per day.