The Republic of Neo Cheese Empire is a colossal, genial nation, ruled by Wabido with a fair hand, and renowned for its compulsory military service, daily referendums, and pith helmet sales. The compassionate, democratic population of 8.111 billion Neo Cheese Empireans hold their civil and political rights very dear, although the wealthy and those in business tend to be viewed with suspicion.

The large, liberal government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Cheeseville. The average income tax rate is 84.6%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Neo Cheese Empirean economy, worth a remarkable 1,038 trillion Cheeses a year, is quite specialized and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Book Publishing, and Retail. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 128,032 Cheeses, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Sex changes are routinely performed at Neo Cheese Empire's hospitals, Neo Cheese Empire successfully hosted the The North Pacific Olympics, discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation is illegal, and the government's new "quiet competence" initiative has supporters and detractors alike reeling in confusion. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Neo Cheese Empire's national animal is the Goat, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Neo Cheese Empire is ranked 281,317^th in the world and 5,927^th in The North Pacific for Most Primitive, scoring -361.03 on the Scary Big Number Scale.