The Federal Republic of Varisland is a colossal, efficient nation, ruled by Yasmijn Kruiper with a fair hand, and renowned for its keen interest in outer space, national health service, and irreverence towards religion. The compassionate, hard-working, democratic, cheerful population of 9.074 billion Varislandians hold their civil and political rights very dear, although the wealthy and those in business tend to be viewed with suspicion.

The medium-sized, liberal, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Industry, Education, and Welfare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Varastad. The average income tax rate is 91.5%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Varislandic economy, worth a remarkable 2,267 trillion Varislandic Marks a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Book Publishing, and Retail. Average income is an amazing 249,937 Varislandic Marks, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The government is continually probing the galaxy in search of alien life, visitors often mistake the toiletplex at music festivals for the main stage, the Varislandic Intelligence Agency has put 'Project Quantum Refrigerator' on hold indefinitely, and counselors have to sign pledges supporting gay rights before they can speak to any patients. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. Varisland's national animal is the Falcon, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies.

Varisland is ranked 291,046^th in the world and 6,365^th in The North Pacific for Most Primitive, scoring -767.76 on the Scary Big Number Scale.