The Pink Holy Lucky Christmas of Izern is a massive, socially progressive nation, ruled by Santa Claus with an even hand, and remarkable for its compulsory military service, daily referendums, and free-roaming dinosaurs. The compassionate, hard-working population of 2.974 billion Santa Clauses have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The medium-sized government juggles the competing demands of Education, Industry, and Defense. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Yggdrassil. The average income tax rate is 76.8%.

The frighteningly efficient Izernian economy, worth 444 trillion Candy Cane Gold Bars a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Tourism, and Retail. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an impressive 149,517 Candy Cane Gold Bars, with the richest citizens earning 5.3 times as much as the poorest.

Census workers struggle to account for the rapidly increasing number of citizens to tabulate, nature magazines featuring stick insects on their covers are sometimes mistaken for fashion magazines, there's a hole in the heart of every Izernian city, and billions of Candy Cane Gold Bars are being blown on orbital weapons development. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Izern's national animal is the Bat, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Athyism.

Izern is ranked 287,334^th in the world and 6,177^th in The North Pacific for Most Primitive, scoring -507.64 on the Scary Big Number Scale.