The Eternal Land of Loutsland is a gargantuan, orderly nation, ruled by Arthur with an iron fist, and remarkable for its closed borders, smutty television, and hatred of cheese. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 10.885 billion Loutslanders are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The large, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Law & Order, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Crescent. The average income tax rate is 97.6%.

The frighteningly efficient Loutslandian economy, worth a remarkable 3,453 trillion Golds a year, is mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Furniture Restoration, Basket Weaving, Tourism, and Woodchip Exports. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an amazing 317,307 Golds, but there is an enormous disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 1,714,690 per year while the poor average 30,415, a ratio of 56.4 to 1.

Arthur's former secretary was last sighted on her new yacht, airplane passengers have been known to stuff pillows in their jackets to get extra arm room, the government only invests in infrastructure after a natural disaster, and citizens are encouraged to report friends, family members or co-workers who seem depressed to the government for "counselling". Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Loutsland's national animal is the Dragon, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is The Loutslandian Church.

Loutsland is ranked 9,712^th in the world and 229^th in The North Pacific for Most Primitive, scoring 95.51 on the Scary Big Number Scale.