The EPU member state of The Soviet States of Europe is a gargantuan, genial nation, ruled by Francesco II Theodosii with an even hand, and notable for its sprawling nuclear power plants, complete lack of prisons, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate, devout population of 11.532 billion europeans are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The enormous government juggles the competing demands of Education, Healthcare, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Saint Philippe. The average income tax rate is 91.1%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient european economy, worth a remarkable 1,348 trillion Eurodubloes a year, is highly specialized and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Tourism and Book Publishing. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 116,915 Eurodubloes, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Immersive video game experiences are interrupted by incessant disclaimer pop-ups, attempts to inform people about their unclaimed property are often mistaken for telephone scams, what's in your genes matters more than what's in your jeans, and blue sky thinkers are reminded that the firmament is actually more of a grey-ish colour. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. The Soviet States of Europe's national animal is the Eagle, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is Trinitism.

The Soviet States of Europe is ranked 277,071^st in the world and 5,787^th in The North Pacific for Most Primitive, scoring -302.61 on the Scary Big Number Scale.